THE 5 MOST METAL FOODS
You know its funny to sometimes see what bands eat during tours. When there is hardly any cash and the Van is constantly breaking down its hard to please your palate with a delicacy when the only affordable ” meal” is a donut from the local 7/11.
So what makes a food metal? well, It has to be affordable otherwise to me its not metal. Easy and simple to eat, so no fucking caviar with pearl spoons here ok? Easy to find because if it ain’t edible on tour It ain’t metal because what would metal be without touring? who knows and who cares. And I know the term sounds funny but bear with me on this one as you will see in the end all you metal guys out there will relate.
5.- POTATO CHIPS
When you are in a hurry before a faceless concert nothing beats a huge bag of your favorite flavor of Doritos (or insert favorite chip name here). And to top it all of it says extreme. Did someone say metal??
4.- HAMBURGUER
when on the road after a gig nothing beats the sight of a huge billboard with a king or a Donald or a girl with ponytails. So if a burger ain’t metal tell that to the soft meat layered in cheese melting in Ozzy’s mouth.
3.- PIZZA
come on its fucking pizza!! who doesn’t like it and if pizza isn’t for metal bastards like me well then… I don’t like metal… yes I said it
2.- BBQ RIBS
Grilling is metal. Come on its meat on top of a metal grill! Nothing beats a good BBQ to the sound of metal on a cheap stereo. Don’t believe me? ask lamb of gods front man Randy Blythe.
5.- BEER
When there is no food or there is food, I prefer an ice cold beer. You know why? to a metal head beer is the whole meal with dessert and everything. Who needs food when there is beer and yes beer is the most metal food on the planet.
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Lays! with some huichol sauce!!
ºº
p.s. u better take p90 with u so i can recognize u when u’re back
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